Springsteen sings: "I won't ask for forgiveness. My sins are all I have."
Of my sins (not my word for them, really): They must be in part the consequence of my decision to abandon my childhood faith, with nothing but art to replace it. I see now that art doesn't provide a moral center. Like all forms of beauty, art throws the world into disarray. My actions reflect that disarray. Usually when I act, I don't know why, and even when I do—rarely: those are the treasured moments of my life—in the end I lack the conviction, the faith in myself, that allow you to live bravely, despite all.